WRDMusic Reviews

My tummy was rumbling so I bowled into a shop to buy some food. After that I went to Club Fabric to watch Tone of Arc. In the middle of her set I thought to myself that I really ought to write some more proper posts instead of Hilarious Lookalikes, MASSIVE QUESTION filler and

“Get back to basics”, I peeped to myself. Not THAT Back To Basics in Leeds I thought immediately afterwards. Micky John and I had sniffed some ket on top of all that M so we were connected through telekinetics on the dance floor. He knew what I was thinking and screamed in my ear that I should claim back my identity and write reviews again because, his words: "YOU'RE THE FUCKING WEEKLY REVIEW OF DANCE FUCKING MUSIC. REVIEW SOME FUCKING TUNES THEN, TONK. I KNOW YOU GOT STRUCK OFF ONE OF THE DISTRIBUTION LISTS FOR TELLING THE TRUTH ABOUT A BLOKE ON HOT CREATIONS AND YOU THINK YOU MIGHT GET YOUR FINGERS BURNED AGAIN BUT STOP FUCKING FRETTING AND LISTEN TO SOME NEW CHOONS INSTEAD OF BANGING ON ABOUT SUNDISSENTIAL AND TONY DE FUCKING VIT."

And people say that ecstasy kills your brain cells! Here's some weekly dance music reviews...

Yousef feat. Charli Taft - I See

Teenage Liverpudlian dance God, Yousef, is best known for winning that Barmy Bedroom DJ competition in Mixmag a couple of years ago. He's now making a name for himself in the UK by opening up a dance label called Circus and making sure-fire club hits which are both powerfully emotive and delightfully enchanting!

I See by Yousef feat. Charli Taft sounds like the music to a 1990s blue Audi Saab advert, in a good way.

Yousef feat. Charli Taft - I See

Out on 28 October 2013 on Defected with remixes from Shadow Child and Crooked Si Man.

Mosquito - San Frandisco

When Fatboy Slim heard this he stuck BOTH of his thumbs up! San Frandisco is disco music the way God and Jesus intended: funky rhythms, snares on the 2 and 4, jiggly guitar licks that are actually better than anything Niles Rogers could come up with and vocals to absolutely die for. I don't have a fucking clue what this song is about but I'm sat here writing about it - it's that banging.

San Frandisco by Mosquito Sounds like Daft Punk pretending to be the Scissor Sisters in a South Ruislip launderette, in a good way.


Mosquito - San Frandisco

Out now with a rework by Matt Kootchi on Good Lucky Recordings in all good record shops and here: The iTunes Shop

Name One and Maxxi Soundsystem - One In Three

This reminds me of a track I made a few years ago on Ableton Live 8 called Two Thirds of Three, except that the track I made was a minimal hard house banger that went on for over nine minutes. One In Three by Name One and Maxxi Soundsystem is just five minutes long and sounds like it could slot easily into Tiga's INTHEMIX.05 CD he did with Ajax in 2005, in a good way.

It starts off with a spooky noise that, in my case, makes you jump before growing into a sparky dance flower that could easily be edited into a 3 minute pop song for the charts. It's just fucking brilliant, to be honest with you. Don't just take my word for it though, I telephoned the managing director of their record label, who had this to say:

Name One’s dark vocals combined with Maxxi Soundsystem’s increasingly impressive production marks ‘One In Three’ as an inspiring collaboration and one that is surely destined for greatness.

Name One and Maxxi Soundsystem - One In Three

Out on 11 November 2013 on Defected with a sparse, bass-driven remix with hardly any of the original vocals in by a mysterious bloke called (Dub)

Fabio Gianelli - Lost In 27 (Remixes)

Lost In 27 sounds like an evil runaway train wheeshing along the track in search of a fat German damsel to run over, in a good way. This nifty remix package backs up the original with a Darius Syrossian pad-athon jack-athon with lovely "Feel It" vocal fills every now and again. I've said many times over the years that a "Feel It" or a "Come On" brighten up ANY track you put them on, and I'm proved right every time.

Wankelmut (stop sniggering! LOLoutLOUD) delivers a not-quite tribal, almost woodland space that is lighter in tone but keeps you pumping and pumping and pumping, getting faster and faster, tightening that grip a little whilst continuing to build and build until you can't take any more and have to release. The pleasure that Wanklemut brings to me is a treasure I find difficult to explain, it's an almost private joy - one that you can share with me and understand if you buy this remix package on Get Physical.

Fabio Gianelli - Lost In 27 (Remixes)

Phew! I can still review music. I've proved to myself, and to Micky John, that I can still listen to a piece of music and then judge the fuck out of it in writing. Fingers crossed the Guardian Guide pick up on this and have me as their guest music reviewer some time soon, eh?

I'll be back later this week with a highly charged MASSIVE QUESTIONS with Severino from Horse Meat Disco and if you go to Ran$om Note dot com on Friday you'll probably see my column (Tonka's Week) where I write down all the things I've done over the last seven days.

I still have FOUR tickets to give away for Random Magic. Four. All you have to do is either draw me a picture, doctor an existing one or just write to me and make me laugh. The competition adjudicators are now as bothered about it as I am. Just make sure you enter and drum up some more business for Fire in Vauxhall and the Random Magic promoters who happen to be very dear and personal friends of mine.

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