WRDM24

Twelve years ago today, Madders sold his majority share in Sundissential to James Priestly and Giles Smith for an undisclosed sum, thought to be in the region and ball park of £550,000.


The two fashionable young men from London were brash. They had a canny business plan and quickly set about tarting up the brand. They then done this there then here:
  • Relocated Sundissential to London
  • Restored the party to Sunday afternoons
  • Controversially changed the name to Secretsundaze
  • SACKED Lisa Lashes, Tidy Boys and Paul Glazby
  • Made themselves resident DJs
  • Dropped the hard from the house
In 2013 Secretsundaze is in a much healthier/trendier state than Sundissential was in 2001. I was lucky enough to be living in Birmingham during the many Tony De Vit memorial parties - which were genuinely terrific tributes but exceptional in the sense that the other fifty one parties of the year were gradually being taken over by school kids wearing yellow wellies and old folk off their heads on beer and speed. Sundissential circa early noughties was, on the whole, fucking appalling. Madders takes a lot of stick but selling his baby for the sake of the baby's future was a very bold move and illustrated the sensitive side his screaming and swearing over the top of peak time Ian M sets often masked.


Moving the party to London, renaming it and changing the music policy was the shot in the arm it needed. I've been right behind the party from the start and I don't even regret the Sundissential tattoo I have on my chest, inked before they scrapped the logo.

On Sunday afternoon I got the tube to North Greenwich and sprinted round to Studio 338 with Micky John and Nikki.

"Tonka plus two."

"Nice to meet you sir. Here's your exclusive plastic yellow wristband"

With a shake of the head and a laugh out loud we all walked through the front door and sniggered at the punters strutting about wearing the paper wristbands.


Soon after buying myself four bottles of Becks for £18 I high-fived a woman wearing a white Ff American Apparel t-shirt and enthusiastically pointed at the Kk on my chest whilst winking.

One Becks, two Becks, three Becks, four. I meandered into the dancing area for some aggressive disco by Floating Points and felt myself getting a bit drunk.




Five Becks, six Becks, seven Becks, eight. I remembered that I had an Ableton Push controller in my pocket that I had to chuck at Portable for his/her/their live set. Which was fucking brilliant.

Nine Becks. I went on the prowl for pills whilst dancing with Micky John and Nikki. Micky John was fucked before we'd even got to Bond Street. He'd been sucking balloons all morning and sounded like Alvin! Omar S was on next and we were sorted. Winking smiley face.




In my head I announced Omar S to the crowd like Madders would have done were he still involved:

"HERE HE FUCKING IS. THE CHAP YOU'VE ALL BEEN FUCKING WAITING FOR. THIS FUCKER'S COME ALL THE WAY FROM DETROIT SO MAKE SOME FUCKING NOISE FOR HIM...OMAR S ON THE PEDALS, LADIES AND GENTLEMEN!!!!!!"


Soon after starting his set with some serious Detroit dance music, he played Don't Go by Yazoo and the hairs on the back of my neck stood on end. They fucking did, I'll be honest.

Allow me to digress.

I'm going to digress now whether you like it or not.

Studio 45 in New York is famous for glamorous music and a clientele consisting entirely of celebrities and people in the music business. These days you could say the same about Secretsundaze. Not only was Tonka (me) striding around like the Thin White Duke but Kristan J Caryl aka Mr Teshno aka a proper good writer, was sitting around making notes and looking all mysterious.

After recognising the distinctive top-knot and black cotton tee, I plucked up the courage to tap him on the shoulder and ask, "is this deep house?" If you're struggling to picture this historic meeting, it was a bit like when James Joyce popped into his local boozer in Trieste and bumped into Howard Marks sat in the snug "reading" Club International.

I was coming up quite heavily at this point, I'd lost Micky John and Nikki to the smoking area and I all I could do was tell Kristan how beautiful his blog was and how amazing it was to finally meet him. Omar S, the anticipation of James Priestly's closing set and the thrilling, throbbing, thronging Sunday afternoon crowd made for a heavy, hopeful atmosphere. An experience I am proud to say I shared with Kristan J Caryl out of Teshno.




I digressed.

Secretsundaze at Studio 338 was fucking brilliant. I'd definitely go again, and you should too. I was going to go up the Elephant and round the Castle for the night party but Micky John said he was getting the evils and wanted to go home. Outside North Greenwich tube, I handed my bright yellow wristband to a member of the homeless community and urged her to hitch a lift to the Coronet...

Secretsundaze x Go Bang day time party at Studio 338
9/10

Follow them here: @secretsundaze
Like them here: facebook
Buy tickets for future events here: upcoming events

Not many nine out of tenners knocking about in the Weekly Review of Dance Music. Well done, lads!

I'll be back very soon with more MASSIVE QUESTIONS, posts, reviews, news and the very first WRDMFM podcast. Definitely.

Follow me: @tonkawrdm
Like me: facebook
Email me: tonkawrdm@gmail.com



MASSIVE QUESTIONS with Acid Mondays

This Tuesday’s Weekly Review of Dance Music has sensationally been moved forward at the behest of the subject of this Tuesday’s MASSIVE QUESTIONS. Acid Mondays hate the rest of the week so much that they agreed to me publishing the interview on the strict proviso that it is published only on a Monday.

Acid Mondays didn't know that the WRDM team were flying over...


I was flown across to the Balearic Islands on a big purple hot air balloon commandeered by my friends at Ibiza Voice Dot Com (ibiza-voice.com). Packed in my satchel was a big red book for an absolute legend of the game (of dance music).

However, instead of landing in the out-door area at Space during Carl Cox’s ultimate rave set, the wind picked up and we crash landed in the back garden of a villa in Sant Miquel de Balasant! As we scrambled out of the bell-end-shaped ripstop nylon envelope, high-fiving one another, we realised that we hadn’t ended up in an old man’s back garden, we’d gate-crashed an afternoon house party at Acid Mondays HQ.


Luckily for us, the music was lovely, the revelers were delicious and Acid Mondays didn’t have us chucked out because as they were hallucinating we were simply dance angels sent from Heaven to interview them for MTV Base.

We did video the following interview but I lost the tape in duty free at Ibiza airport – luckily for you, I have a photographic memory. Here is the transcript from the bottom of my mind:

Q) For anyone unfamiliar with Acid Mondays could you tell THEM who you are, what you do and why you do it?
A) We are a House & Techno duo from the fifth dimension who love making beats & collecting vinyl.

Q) Has getting established in the dance music industry been an uphill struggle or a walk in the fucking park because you're dead good at DJing, like?
A) Anything that has solid roots and grows naturally takes time and a lot of hard work. Skill, vision and dedication all play major parts in the process.

                               

Q) Open or closed hi-hat?
A) Both, run through our Sp1200.

Q) How did you come up with the moniker, Acid Mondays? Did you ever toy with the idea of prefixing it with DJ, like proper DJs (DJ Acid Mondays) or suffixing it with something more exciting, like Techno Gang (DJ Techno Gang) or Beat Krew (DJ Beat Krew)?
A) Acid Mondays was a name used to describe our colourful nights out from summer gone by and has stuck reminding us of those endless nights spent on the dance floor.


Q) What's your involvement in the Zoo Project? Are you the residents or did you invent it?
A) We play regularly as part of a strong lineup of some of the best Underground dance music past, present and future.

Q) The line up at Zoo Project Festival looks solid. Apart from Acid Mondays, Midland, Evan Baggs and DJ Sneak, who are you most looking forward to seeing?
A) Joy Orbison, Boddika & Funk E.




Q) What has been the scariest thing you've experienced whilst on a Monday afternoon acid trip? Mine was Freddy Kruger's face EVERYWHERE and what felt like a descent into Hell on the way to the chip shop in Muswell Hill...but that was on a Saturday afternoon and I'd taken (mu)shrooms.
A) Our friend Carlo Davids ever expanding sweat patches and Garry Todd’s driving.

Q) I've been to Kettering and it's fucking shit. On the Zoo Project Festival website it looks fucking brilliant. Who's lying?
A) The festival site has moved to Donnington now so unfortunately we wont be able to let you know. Guess its all about perspective though.


Q) What is Ibiza like?
A) Pure energy, with some of the best vibes on earth.

Q) What is your all-time favourite mix CD and why?
A) Mixmag Cosmic disco by Derrick Carter! Timeless house and techno created in 1997 that is still relevant today.




Q) Were you disappointed that you only completed the production of I Married A Pineapple four years after Top of the Pops was cancelled, thus being cruelly denied the chance to perform it in front of a mainstream UK audience?
A) We are holding out for a closing set on Blue Peter.

Q) Joan Collins or Joanna Lumley?
A) Neither.


Q) What do Acid Mondays do when Ibiza isn't open?
A) Studio, touring and time traveling.

Q) Do you have any advice for any young readers of this blog who are looking to break into the dance music industry?
A) Listen to your gut feeling, be true to yourself & don’t follow the crowd and give everything a listen.




Q) Stone cold sober or absolutely fucking terminated?
A) It’s all about the balance.

Q) Literally dozens of people read this blog every year. Is there anything you want to plug on WRDM?
A) We have an EP called ‘Hoffmans Bumbag’ due out soon on Contemporary Scarecrow, that’s going to be a vinyl only release. Then after the summer we have a remix for Boris Horel on La Vie En Rose, a remix of an old S-Men track on Sneak Classics and a remix for the German Jazz legend Wolfgang Haffner that’s coming out on Timo Mass’s Rockets & Ponies label.

                             

What a lovely pair of young men. Please join me in wishing them both all the best for their future endeavours and send them the best vibes you can.

You can listen to and BUY their stuff here: soundcloud.com/acid-mondays

Like THEM here: facebook

Tweet them NOW@acidmondays

Veering away wildly: MASSIVE QUESTIONS with Brandon Block is up soon, the very first WRDM podcast will be available for download and you’ll be able to READ AND SHARE a mountain of posts.

The world famous Weekly Review of Dance Music was not voted BLOG OF THE WEEK at The Guardian for nothing.

Follow me by clicking this: @tonkawrdm

Like me by clicking this: facebook

Email me by copying (Ctrl + C) the following email address and pasting (Ctrl + V) it into the ‘To’ field: tonkawrdm@gmail.com

 

WRDM23

The Bill Medley & Jennifer Warnes remix of I've Had The Time of My Life by the Black Eyed Peas settled down in my head as I swerved into the northern French shipping port of Calais on my big purple motorbike. I was on my way home after a timely time away (from home (England)).



Where have you been, Tonka?

I'd been put off going to Eastern Electrics a couple of weeks ago by Seth Troxler's naked DJ set so I decided to go to the Bugged Out! Weekender in Minehead instead. You can't argue with Inner City, Hudson Mohawke, L-Vis 1990 and The Neon Dreams live plus Diplo, Chase and Status, Erol Alkan, 2ManyDjs, Joker, Eats Everything, Simian Mobile Disco, Maya Jane Coles, 2 Bears, Riton, Andrew Weatherall & Ivan Smagghe, Sub Focus, 16 Bit, Friction, Zinc, Redlight, SBTRKT, Joy Orbison, Martyn, Julio Bashmore, James Holden, James Holroyd, Matt Walsh, Casper C, Stopmakingme, Green Velvet, Kevin Saunderson, L-Vis 1990, Bok Bok, Ben UFO, Girl Unit, Jam City, Jackmaster, Deadboy, Spencer, Justin Robertson, Hannah Holland, Severino, Dan Beaumont on the decks so I jumped on top of my massive purple motorbike and hit the M4 followed by the A303.




To be honest, it was fucking insane. Highlights were:
  • Maya Jane Coles' surprise vocal set where she dressed up as Katy Perry and sang ALL of her songs in a faux American accent. LOL.
  • Green Velvet's surprise afternoon set of old-school party classics; I Am The Music Man, Agadoo, The Wheels on the Bus, Grand Old Duke of York and Cha Cha Slide. PMSL.
  • Andrew Weatherall and Ivan Smagghe dressing up as Bob the Builder and Bob the Builder's missus and making everyone laugh. ROFLOFL
I'd done so many mushrooms on the first day that, for the rest of the weekend, every other person I saw seemed to be wearing red and they were all surrounded by children. As you can imagine, it was a terrific atmosphere but still fucking weird.



I even saw Dan Beaumont and Severino REMOVED BY LAWYERS REPRESENTING TONKA some REMOVED BY LAWYERS REPRESENTING TONKA over the side of a dodgem in a proper shady shroomagination.

Doing all of those hallucinogenic drugs at the Bugged Out! Weekender meant that when I finally sobered up at home I realised that it wasn't even January 2011 anymore and I'd actually been in Bognor Regis. What a weekend!

Hang on a minute, you said you'd just got back from France.

After getting messy at the Bugged Out! Weekender I always like to take it down a notch and chill out abroad. LOL. Let me make something clear to you now: chilling out to you is listening to Steven Tang and smoking spliff, chilling out to me is driving my enormous purple motorbike around foreign countries and testing the ecstasy in loads of different clubs. And so it was I powered into Bongo Bongo Land.




I like to call France Bongo Bongo Land because no matter which club you go to, the DJ always seems to play at least one track with a bongo in it.

Simply put, basically and at the end of the day, I got absolutely fucking terminated at eight French clubs in four days:

Magazine
84, rue de Trévise, 59000 Lille, France


Magazine was the best. I did six halves, four lines towards the end and got my shit box pinched at least twice.

Le Buck
23 boulevard Saint Maurice; 87000; Limoges; France

Le Buck was atrocious but I managed to get a free pint after complaining to the manageress that my waiter had given me too much head on the previous two servings.


L'Elektron
8 avenue de L'energie; 67800; Bischheim; France

Cool name, even cooler clientele  This place is as cool as fuck and the music they play is proper fucking cool.

VIP Room - St Tropez
Résidence du nouveau port; 83990; St Tropez; France

The only reason the bouncers let me into this place was because when they saw me pull up on my gigantic purple motorbike they thought I was part of Prince's entourage. I tipped them five euros each as I quitté the club 10 minutes later.




Rex Club
5 boulevard Poissonnière; 75002; Paris; France

This was just like being in Club Fabric in London except I was surrounded by French and English people instead of Italian and English people. I would definitely go again.

Ninkasi Kao
267 rue Marcel Merieux 69007 Lyon

This place was hilarious. I got friendly with some locals and we were talking all Japanese to the bar staff. Proper banter. Proper funny.


FatKat
7 Rue Marcel Sembat - 33100 Bordeaux / rive droite

By the time I got to this place it had shut down! I went to a nearby Irish pub, sniffed a massive line of ketamine in the bogs and shat myself. I didn't know who I was, where I was, when I was, why I was or what I was...and I was controlling the fiddle music with my mind.

LC Club Nantes
21 Boulevard des Antilles; 44200; Nantes; France

Every good nightclub has at least two Happy Hours on cocktails and shots, LC Club Nantes was no exception. I refuse to read or speak French but I do know what the text 2hrs Happy Hour positioned next to the picture of a cocktail means and I know how to point aggressively at menus. The cocktails were shit and the music was even fucking shitter. After drinking Cosmopolitans for two hours I stuck to the lager.

I'm sure you'll agree that today's post was well worth the two weeks wait. Two weeks is a long time in politics and an even longer time in dance music blogging. One week you're BLOG OF THE WEEK in The Guardian, the next you're desperately trying to make yourself heard and remembered over the mutants who write similar stuff but not half as good as the all of the posts that you've been writing for over TWO YEARS without getting paid or offered any sort of freelance work despite it all being fucking brilliant.

I'll be back soooooooooooooooooooooon with a very special MASSIVE QUESTIONS and more of the same, more of the same and more of the same.

TWEET the fuck out of me: @tonkawrdm

LIKE me like you mean it: facebook

MAKE me offers: tonkawrdm@gmail.com


PS. Check out these HILARIOUS pictures I took abroad. Talk about funny foreigners!!! LOL and ROFL.


Who drives a pink and green car?! ONLY abroad!!! LOL
I don't need a fucking sign to stop me walking off the edge of a cliff abroad! LOL. Only in France!!! ROFLOFL
Somebody needs to tell Kelloggs in France that Tresor is a techno nightclub in Germany before they end up with egg on their faces!!!! PMSL
Is it me or should Thierry Mugler sack his advertising executive?! HAHAHA
Vic and Bob always used to say that you can't give a baby booze. They ought to get on the blower to Kelloggs in France and tell them in French that Smacks means bags of heroin in English and they should NOT be marketing them to children and babies! LOL

OUT OF OFFICE

I never thought I'd say this but, I'm closing the Weekly Review of Dance Music...for 2 weeks.

/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/

I am currently out of the office. I return on Monday 19 August 2013.


I will NOT be on tonkawrdm@gmail.com
I will NOT be on @tonkawrdm
I will NOT be on facebook

I am STILL Blog of the Week in The Guardian.

The Weekly Review of Dance Music will ALWAYS be your favourite dance music and modern culture blog.

Russell - your prizes are in the post.

The estimated time of arrival for MASSIVE QUESTIONS with Brandon Block is still to be confirmed.

WRDM23 will be deployed upon my return to WRDM HQ.


WATCH:






            

                                                        
                                                                     


Feat. Templeton Peck

Flushed with a fresh flush of success because of how good I write sentences like (I'm STILL Blog of the Week in The Guardian), I am now in a position to offer little guest spots to people who want to be able to write as good as what I do on THIS blog, the world famous Weekly Review of Dance Music.

Templeton Peck writes.


Malibu Stacy at Hanover Grand - on manouevers to get past Toni Tambourine on the door (always scary but never had a problem), west London public school lads in tartan trousers, lots of trannies, Seb Mundane on the decks, Judge Jules and his occasional trumpet, Jon of the Pleased. Fiction and Glitterati at The Cross were ‘glam’. Models, A-gays and euro power clubbers wearing real designer clothing. Women that I wouldn't even dream of talking to. Ariel spinning for 10 hours at Bagleys, Renaissance, Pushca, Smartie Partie, Turnmills, Gardening Club. Pissed-up recruitment consultants losing their minds to Jeremy Healy. Smokin Jo. Nicky Holloway and Carl Cox at the Velvet Rooms, now vapourised by Crossrail. Saturdays at Club UK in a Wandsworth shopping centre, hot hot and very very messy. Fabio Paras. Luvdup. SW1. Leisure Lounge in Holborn. Saturdays at Ministry for Tony Humphries - great music played to boring tourists. The Zap in Brighton. Club Aquarium swimming pool diseases. Shiny shirts. Pepe jeans. John Richmond. Paul Smith. Drinks with city boys at Mash or Atlantic Bar & Grill. Trade at 4am, politely queuing up for the dealers. The End.

If you don't understand that you better dash like Dame.