This week's MASSIVE QUESTIONS were answered by an absolute giant of dance. For all sane people who are into dance music, the name Jeremy Healy only conjurers up happy memories. Memories of a time when clubs were super, when DJs were super and when £4000 bottles of champagne, bad behaviour, cocaine and blow jobs were putain de du jour for the average mid-90s DJ. These days our so-called superstar DJs only play in east London warehouses to 300 wankers. Jeremy Healy, I'm guessing, never played to less than 7000 punters per gig between the year 1993 and 1998. Now who's the winner?

Last weekend I followed Jeremy to Heathrow's Terminal 5. I then barked questions at him over a cubicle door whilst he was having a shit. He was kind enough to answer them all, bar one.


Q) Jeremy Healy is a name that EVERYONE interested in dance music should be aware of. For readers of this blog who don’t know the details, could you let them know how long you’ve been in the industry and what kind of things you’ve achieved.
A) I have been dancin' since I was 12, and that's a mighty long time. I have had an amazing life; spreading joy and happiness through music all over our beautiful planet for nearly 30 years now.

Q) Who were your influences when you first started out?
A) Fred Flintstone, tee hee. Music in the 70s then it had to be Bowie.

Q) Which, if any, of the new generation of DJs/producers are you listening to?
A) I am feelin' Gucci Vump right now.

Q) Is there much that surprises you about dance music/club culture anymore?
A) No, but I just got back from a great club in Bali called Cocoon. Its my new fave.

Q) Would you consider jumping on the band reunion bandwagon and getting Haysi Fantayzee back together?
A) Nope.

Q) Slow and circular insertions or fast and hard, piston-like thrusts?

Q) Is there a dance music compilation that you will never tire of? Mine is the Jacque Lu Cont FabricLive CD – I just KNOW that it’ll still be listenable when I’m in my 70s.
A) I don't listen to any but I like Jacque Le Stuart so I am gonna check out your recommendation. 

Q) Without talking professionally, what are you plans for 2012? Do you have any nice holidays coming up, any gadgets you have you’re eyes on, fancy cars? Fun stuff.
A) I am really busy, and have just come back from Asian tour so no more hols right now. I am a car perv, so if it all works out well this year I may well swap my 911 for something tastier.

Q) Do you have any advice for the young readers of this blog who are looking to break into dance music?
A) Read Q by Quincy Jones. Its my favourite music autobiography.

Q) Clap or snare?
Take care.

Q) What aspect or highlight of your career are you most proud of – singing, DJing, promoting, producing, remixing, musical directing for fashion houses? If there is anything I’ve missed, please fill me in.
A) Its the next challenge the excites me the most.

Q) Stone cold sober or absolutely fucking terminated?
A) Sober right now.

Q) What are you plans for 2012 in a professional sense?
A) To make all the shows; Dior, Galliano, Lamb, Pucci and Victoria Secret the best yet. The new club I am involved in to be a smash hit and enjoy DJing this years great parties.

Q) Curate your fantasy night. Whats it called, what’s the line-up, what’s the venue and is there a dress code?
A) I haven't the time to answer that properly but its a good question.

Q) Anne Diamond?
Frank Bofff.

Q) Does Ibiza still have a magical hold over your soul? I’ve never been, so which Ibizan nightspot would you recommend I hit SHOULD I save enough money to go this year?
A) No it doesn't, and hasn't for quite a few years though I still enjoy my visits. I don't like any of the big clubs anymore, but if you aint been you have to go!!!!!

Q) In its 90s heyday, was Miss Moneypennys as glamorous and debauched as I imagined it to be? As a sixteen year old I was never allowed in DESPITE wearing Farah trousers, a crisp white Soviet shirt and my dad’s shoes. Do you have a favourite Miss Moneypennys anecdote?
A) It was probably as glamorous as Birmingham gets, nice boys, nice scene but nothing's forever.

Q) I want to make enough money from this so that I can stop working in an office with people I don’t like. Could you pull some strings with anybody at Mixmag or DJ Magazine and get me regular paid writing work? Alternatively, I could write for you. I’m on £22,000 per year at the moment so they/you would need to match or better that for me to consider.
A) Now the begging?

Q) Do you have any upcoming gigs or releases? If so, where can readers of this blog buy tickets/copies?
A) Workin' on a track next week with an Indonesian pop star called Rossa, which if it works out shall be released ………

What a nice man and what sensational chat! That was definitely NOT a dreadful interview. That cannot be said by anyone. It was not awful or lazy AT ALL. Jeremy Healy is not only a superstar DJ, he is also a gentleman. Please join me in wishing him all the very best for the future, and support him by only buying Dior and Galliano threads from NOW ON.

I'll be back next week with either WRDM12 or an interview with Gavin Herlihy; he's dragging his fucking feet if truth be told. I'm also approaching lots more people in the industry for interviews so keep your lids peeled.

Follow me on Twitter here: @tonkawrdm

You can follow Jeremy on Twitter by ringing this number: @jeremy_healy